We all have batteries that fuel us and batteries that need
to be recharged. My question, this morning, is what fuels your batteries? Such a hard question to get our hearts
around, because we all want to scream out, “The love of the Lord”, or “Jesus is
my fuel and my source”…and that can be true, on most days.
Yet, I find that the grave clothes and vestiges of self are
so hard to dismiss and get rid of. I
think “dying to self” is one of the hardest tasks that we are called to. To be in the world, but not of it. We have all grown up with these words, heard
them, recite them, teach them to our children….but, HOW??
How do you “Walk in the world, but not be OF it”? How do you “Die to Self”…that all sounds
great and feels so smooth rolling off of our Christian tongues..but, really…what
does THAT mean?
I can only speak in terms of what the Lord has taken me
through and the places that He has claimed as His own in my heart. I was born into the Catholic tradition. I received all of my sacraments and struggled
to find God within the confines of the Catholic Church. As a young adult, in college, I turned away
from God- because I found so much hypocrisy within the walls of
the Church. After loosing my grandmother,
my world turned upside down and backwards…..and I found myself reaching out,
once again, for God. I attended a church that God came alive
within my heart and was a tangible presence….Our Lady Of Fatima. He was
alive, He was real. Through bible
studies and young adult groups…I grew in understanding. Through service projects, I saw the need of
others and responded with compassion.
But, I still walked in the world.
I spent my time on Sundays at church and was moved to tears by the music
and the message. I had my small group
Thursday night, led some Bible Studies, participated in other Bible Studies. I was asked to speak at church, I served as a
Eucharistic minister at church- but the world still held most of my heart. I was content with Church 2-3 times a week ,
for a few hours – and a whole lot of ME time for the rest of the week.
The music I listened to, the movies I watched, the books I
read, the bars, night clubs, and dance places I frequented….did not speak of my
Christian walk and the Lordship of Jesus in my heart….my lifestyle spoke of the
Lordship of ME in my life- with a little bit of room allowed to Jesus.
Dying to self happened over the course of the next 20, some
odd years…one step at a time. One DECISION at a time. I started to choose a spiritual book, and
inspirational novel or bible study – over the most recent trashy novel. I found that when I did attempt to pick up
something “trashy” I had a quiet discontent, and did not enjoy it any more.
I found that movies started to offend me…slowly, slowly…one
step at a time. Movies that would have
made me chuckle years ago – seemed to stir that quiet discontent again.
As I made one decision at a time, God owned more of my heart
and my battery fuel was s-l-o-w-l-y changing.
The key word here is SLOWLY. God
is never in a rush to refine us. He
takes His time, and He refines us with His love – even though it hurts
sometimes. It seems that with each “better”
choice I made- I had a bit more peace and joy.
The world feeds us anger, competitiveness, jealousy, resentment, and
comparison as our fuel. As I made –one.choice.at a .time- my heart seemed to get lighter. My
fuel was changing , my batteries were being charged by a different source.
From a worldly view, the prospect of giving up the world
appears to be impossible and absolutely no fun.
The Christian walk appears to be fraught with hypocrisy and
judgment. That is what satan would have
us believe. Give up the world and you
give up fun. Give up the world and you
give up laughter. Give up the world and
embrace a Christian walk – and you will have to have your Bible with you all
the time, so you can hit people with it.
Going to embrace a Christian walk?
You better get a soapbox and a refined, manicured pointer finger- to
point the **FINGER OF JUDGMENT* at
everyone.
One.choice.at.a.time – you realize that is a lie born out of
hell itself.
One.choice.at.a.time – you find the stillness of God in your
soul as a gift.
One.choice.at.a.time – you find joy, real joy…bubbling out,
uncontainable joy....... and laughter .....and fun, that originates from a different source.
One.choice.at.a.time –you find those movies really are
offensive and don’t speak life into your heart, or your families heart.
One.choice.at.a.time –you find you are choosing different
reading material
One.choice.at.a.time –you find you WANT to read the Bible
and discover God within the living pages.
One.choice.at.a.time –you find you WANT to be at Church
One.choice.at.a.time –you find that Sundays, alone, isn’t enough
anymore
One.choice.at.a.time –you find you are changing from the
inside out
One.choice.at.a.time –your countenance changes
One.choice.at.a.time –you are no longer judging, but loving.
One.choice.at.a.time –your batteries have been switched over
to refining fuel of oil. Your batteries
are brand new,
I still have to make One.choice.at.a.time . The world always
tries to take back that which we have given over to God. There are always new books and new movies
that “everyone is talking about”. But, I
make One.choice.at.a.time . I press into
God and I pray for strength and I pray that I make the right choices. Yes, I do make wrong choices too. But, my God is always ready to remove the
scalding oil of the world from my batteries, the second I ask Him to…and He
replaces it with the fuel of His Spirit and a stronger resolve in my heart, to
not partake again.
What fuels your batteries?
Are you ready to make One.choice.at.a.time –
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